Abuse comes in different forms and can impact you both during and after. It can still have an affect on you in the years after in your later life.
Different forms of abuse are sexual, physical, emotional, and domestic abuse.
Sexual abuse.
Sexual abuse is anything from rape to an abuser exposing themselves to the victim. You can be a victim of sexual abuse at any age. Not all cases are reported as some are not sure if it abused or are too scared to tell others.
Forms of sexual abuse are as followed:
- Abuser sending unwanted images of themselves or showing you their private areas.
- Unwanted kissing
- Touching you unconsented above or below your clothing
- Penetrating you with anything (an object, finger, or penis)
- Unconsented sex this is rape.
For victims of any form of sexual abuse will have a trigger point and will see these triggers throughout life. Triggers for victims can include seeing it on the tv. Shows like soap operas have story lines based on different forms of abuse and it can be very distressing for a victim to watch these. Helplines are available for victims if they are struggling after watching these episodes. Seeing an abuser again can cause a victim’s emotions to spiral out of control. Talking about abuse if you haven’t spoken about it before can have negative mental health impacts. Anyone can be your abuser, from a family member or someone you have never met before. Victims of sexually abused can go unnoticed as signs may not always be visible.
Signs of sexual abused include:
- Genital pain
- Itching or swelling of intimate areas
- Bleeding
- Bruising of the skin
- Substance abuse
- Memory loss
- Fear of being alone
Both adults and children can be victims of sexual abuse. It is a crime to sexually abuse anyone. Sexual abuse can have an increasingly negative impact on your mental health if you try to move on and ignore it without seeking help. Your happiness and self-worth are affected the longer you wait to get help. Depression can sink in as you question your self-worth and negative thoughts can arise.
Surviving sexual abuse is an emotional rollercoaster but is very important. Survivors of abuse are more likely to become depressed, have suicidal thoughts, and self-harm. Outbursts of depression, rage, becoming emotionally shut off, even suffering with memory loss are likely for victims of sexual abuse. Seeking help is best to prevent mental illnesses. As your brain tries to forget the abuse you forget the happy times around them as well. Sexual abuse victims may find it difficult to become intimate with future partners as they could still live in fear of their abusive past. for sexual abuse victims there is help. Support is available through professional counselling. Councillors are available to any aged victim and help you to
get back to the person you were before your abuse. Reporting sexual abuse to the police is always best as this is a criminal offence and could happen to others.” More than 1 in 5 women and 1 in 20 men have experienced rape or sexual assault as adults. rapecrisis.org.uk”
Physical abuse.
Physical abuse is another form of abuse that can affect a person’s mental health. Victims of physical abuse can become depressed and fearful as they start to be abused. This type of abuse can sometimes be harder to hide as it can leave marks on your skin.
Ways you can be physically abused include:
- Grabbed aggressively
- Hair pulling
- Biting
- Slapping and punching
- Abuser burning you
- Pushing you
Being physically abused can happen to you at any age and can affect your mental health. Depression, fear, and suicidal thoughts can take over stopping you enjoying your daily life. As you live in fear of upsetting your abuser you become unsociable and lose relationships. This is a crime and should be reported. It isn’t always as victims hide their abuse due to being petrified.
Physical abuse signs can be seen both physically and mentally.
Signs include:
- Unexplainable bruising
- Burn marks
- Wearing to much clothing (long sleeve tops in the summer to cover marks)
- Excessive substance use
- Underweight
- Head injuries
- Always on ‘high alert’
- Flinches from sudden movements
- Shies away from physical touch
- Bald patches on head
We are seeing more of children being physically abused and dying. If you think someone is being abused reach out. They are at risk of death. “Nearly 5.3 million incidents of domestic violence occur annually among US women aged 18 years and older, with 3.2 million occurring among men Natasha Tracy www.healthyplace.com”.
In most cases a victim of physical abuse will also be subjected to another type. For example, a victim of physical abuse will also suffer emotional abuse as the abuser has threatening behaviour.
Emotional abuse.
Victims of emotional abuse have increased risks of developing depression. emotional abusers make you live to please them at the cost of your own happiness. You start losing interest in things you enjoyed before. Victims can become suicidal. Ways to notice notice emotional abuse include:
- Humiliation in front of others or alone
- Abuser telling you are to sensitive
- Belittling your dreams
- Trying to control you
- Blaming you for their problems
- Being emotionally distant
- Isolating you from friends and family
- Points out your mistakes
You will eventually end up living in fear of disappointing your abuser as they make you feel worthless without them. They start to control you and your everyday life. A victim of emotional abuse will be in denial, saying things like their abuser is just looking out for them and just wants the best for them. You may find it difficult to notice emotional abused because there are no physical signs.
Signs of emotional abused:
- Self-destructive behaviour
- Hypersensitive to criticism
- Struggles to let emotional guard down
- Constantly apologises.
Children can also be victims to emotional abuse. Signs to look out for are different to adults:
- Scared when sleeping alone
- Fear of loud noises or dark rooms
- Doesn’t want to talk in front of others
Seeking help is recommended for all victims as it can affect your life in the future. Depression will eventually control a victim of emotional abuse.
Domestic abuse.
Domestic abuse victims are normally ages 16 and over and it is normally between family or partners. It can be the start of other forms of abuse. Domestic abuse can isolate you from others as the abuser controls you. Covid-19 seen an increase in domestic abuse due to having to isolate and stay indoors. You should seek help for domestic abuse victims as it can lead to death. Domestic abuse can start as being forced to do different things but it can end in being raped, even death.
Abusers have different personality traits. Signs of a domestic abuser are:
- Sudden mood swings
- Acting overconfident
- Extreme jealousy or controlling
- History of battery
- Blaming others for their actions/problems
- Cruelty to animals and children
- Constantly checking up partner
Life after abuse.
Even after your period of abuse has stopped your mental health may still deteriorate. Depressive moments, anxiety and questioning your self-worth will still come in waves and try to control you. Flash backs of the period of abuse will happen but with counselling and support life can continue to be better than before. A good support network is key when learning to cope after abuse. Talking to others about your trauma gives them a better understanding on you as a person because the abuse can change you. Learning to manage your emotions as you move on from abuse is important to keeping a healthy mental state.
To get help for you or someone who is suffering from abuse please get in touch with the Helplines on the Contact page.