Many people experience regret in their life, with 90% of people stating they have major regret in their life. It can be mild, but it can also get very severe which then it will start to affect your mental wellbeing. Regret can not only affect your mind, but it can affect your behaviour as well.
What is regret?
It is an emotion where you wish you had made a different decision in the past. People may feel regret in different ways, such as regret of an action, saying something you wish you hadn’t, unproductive regret and so on. Regret involves a lot of self-blame and self-loathing, and it can have serious damaging effects on our mind and body.
How can regret affect you?
Serious regret can have very damaging effects on both your mind and body, it can affect how we live our daily life depending on the reason for the regret and it can also affect our relationships. People who experience regret tend to think negatively of themselves and have feelings of self-blame. It can also trigger depression and anxiety which if not dealt with, can have serious damaging effects on our bodies, minds, and life’s.
Can regret be a good thing?
Regret can be good in the sense of knowing what not to do. It helps you to stay away from making the same mistakes and learn from them. Mistakes are what make us human, nobody’s perfect and everyone makes mistakes. It’s how we deal with these mistakes that matter and how we overcome the regret and acknowledge that we made a mistake and focus on becoming better.
What are some regrets that people may experience?
Wasting time – This may be overworking and wasting precious time with the ones that mean most, or not doing enough.
Not being true to yourself – This is when you pretend to be someone you’re not, whether it’s because you are in denial or because of the unrealistic high standards and expectations of society and how you should be.
Doing something bad – When you do something you shouldn’t it can create feelings of guilt and regret. This can be anything depending on your boundaries and standards of what’s right. Everything can cause feelings of regret.
Missed opportunities – Whether this be applying for a job, speaking to someone, travelling, etc, this can cause regret and wishing you had gone for it instead of holding yourself back due to fear.
Arguments – In a heated moment it can be easy to say or do some nasty things and then regret it once calmed down. This can affect your relationship and yourself as you may have feelings of hatred towards yourself and have doubts about what you deserve.
Not saying anything – When you feel something and you keep it to yourself whether it be due to pride or being scared, it can cause feelings of regret and wondering what could have been if you have the confidence to speak up.
What is the difference between minor regrets and serious regrets?
Minor regrets will be something easier to overcome and not dwell on, whereas serious regrets will be a lot more difficult, and it may start to affect your mental health as it’s all you can focus on. If you suffer with serious regret, it can affect how you see yourself and you may experience feelings of self-hatred, which may lead to depression. Severe regret is something that you may need to get help for if you can’t seem to move past it/being stuck in the past and minor regrets will be easier to leave in the past and learn from them. Although everyone may experience regret differently, it can be hard to move on from it rather than indulging into it.
What are some signs you are struggling with regret?
Although everyone is different and deals with situations differently, everyone can experience regret and some of the signs may include:
- Feelings of guilt
- Shame
- Anxiety
- Sadness/depression
- Anger
- Feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness
- Alcohol/drug abuse
How can we move on from regret?
It can be very difficult to overcome and move on from, some people may see it as avoiding the issue. However, that is not the case. Moving on from it is accepting it and dealing with the consequences.
Forgive yourself – You need to remember that we all make mistakes, it’s what makes us real. Acknowledge your wrong doings and accept that you made a mistake.
Apologise when needed – The key to overcoming regret is owning up to your mistakes and apologising where necessary. This will lift a weight off your shoulders and make you feel better about your actions and will help to not make the same mistake and understand the reasoning.
Learn from it and set boundaries with yourself – When you acknowledge your wrong doings, it becomes easier to learn from it and not make that mistake again. Set boundaries in what is wrong and what is acceptable, live to your own standards and expectations.
Practice self-love and acceptance – Once you practice self-love, those feelings of hatred, sadness, guilt will be a memory. You will accept yourself for all your flaws and you will be able to move on and deal with things more effectively. Accept that you make mistakes, we all do. Accept you for you and others will follow.
Embrace the truth – No excuses, just truthfulness. Once you embrace it and accept it, regret will be less of a burden.
Conclusion
be a serious issue in many of our lives. It can affect us in ways such as our mind, our body and behaviour, and our daily lives. We all make mistakes, at the end of the day it is how you deal with these mistakes, that is what makes us real. We all need to learn to forgive ourselves. Dwelling on the past only holds us back from unleashing our true potential and living life to the fullest. We only get one life, live it how you want to and accept yourself for things that cause regret in our lives. Rather than letting it eat away at us, come up with solutions.