Lying is a really bad habit that someone can have and some lies can really affect people’s lives including your own. However, can it be acceptable? Lying can range from white lies to extreme lies, and there are many types of lies someone can say.
What is a white lie?
A white lie is when someone tells a harmless lie to avoid hurting someone’s feelings. For example, telling someone you love a gift when you don’t. White lies tend to be more beneficial for the person being lied to rather than the perpetrator. Whereas major lies tend to be done more maliciously and done with intent.
Why is lying bad?
Lying is a bad habit to have as you may find yourself lying more and finding it easier to lie than just tell the truth. Lying can affect the other person’s feelings and cause trust issues within a relationship, no matter the size of the lie. However it can also affect you with guilt and shame.
Lying can make you lose your identity and make you become someone you’re not and it can really affect someone’s self-esteem and shatter relationships.
Common lies that people tell
Telling someone you are fine – This is a common lie that people tell to others when they don’t want to discuss their feelings. This affects them more as they are closing off from people that love and care about them and can trigger mental health problems like depression.
“It’s ok” – When you get your feelings hurt, some people don’t like to discuss it and would rather pretend it’s ok when it’s not. This can cause a lot of anger for the person saying it as they may hold a grudge to a certain situation rather than talking about it and it will affect them in similar situations.
Telling someone you love and care for them – This is an extreme lie that’s usually used by manipulators and gaslighters. This may be to throw you off, and is usually done for their own benefit.
Lying about cheating – Cheating is very common and lying about it is even more so. Many cheaters don’t tend to admit that they have cheated, they may lie about it and keep doing so behind someone’s back and this will affect the other person’s feelings if they were to find out and affect their future relationships as it damages trust and self-esteem/confidence.
Lying about lying – Many people don’t like to be caught out, and when they are they may lie about it. This can make someone feel like they are crazy and second guess themselves.
Is lying ever acceptable?
Lying isn’t always a bad thing. People may feel like lying is the best option not to harm someone and moral to do so. Lying can come from a place of love, although it is important to note that it shouldn’t become a regular thing. Lying can seriously damage relationships, no matter how big the lie is, so you need to be careful not to make a habit of it.
In my opinion, I would rather hear the truth whether it hurts me or not. However, lying can be acceptable when you want to protect someone you love and care about, as long as it is not a major lie.
When is lying acceptable?
Lying is only acceptable when you are not causing any harm. People tend to mix up major lies with white lies, and many liars convince themselves that they are doing nothing wrong and may start to believe their own lies. Telling a lie when you are looking after the other person’s best interests is acceptable. Some things are just better left unsaid, rather than lying about it and harming the other person.
It also can be acceptable when you are protecting someone’s mental state. If someone is in a bad way, sometimes the truth may do more harm and it is better for them not to hear it right now. When someone’s mental and emotional state is already harmed, the truth can cause a breakdown rather than helping them to overcome their issues.
Another acceptable time to lie is when planning a surprise for someone. A surprise isn’t when someone knows what is happening, and that is ok to lie about to keep the mystery and surprise.
Can lying be addictive?
Believe it or not, lying can find its way on controlling your life. Some people enjoy telling lies and not care about the consequences on the other person. Even telling little lies can be addictive as you may start to tell lies more often. Some people find lying fun, but this is usually when someone is a bit of a sociopath and enjoys seeing others suffer due to these lies.
How can lying affect someone?
Lies can affect people in many different ways, such as;
Lack of confidence
Trust issues
Depression and anxiety
Low self-esteem
Hatred
Lack of self-love
Destroy inner-peace
No feeling of respect
Negative thoughts (about themselves or relationships)
Hard to move on and trust someone else
Self-doubt and relationship doubt
Conclusion
Although lying is normally a bad thing, lying can be acceptable and it can help someone when they are struggling. Lying is something that can be acceptable when you are protecting someone, but it is not acceptable when you are lying maliciously and doing it just to cause hurt in a relationship. It can really affect someone’s mental health and cause someone to doubt themselves and any relationships they may be involved in.
It is very important not to make lying a common thing you do, as it can be addictive. As much as lying affects the person being lied to, it can just as badly affect the liar. It can cause guilt, shame, lack of relationships and trust. The most important thing to note is if you love and care about someone, you won’t continuously lie and disrespect the person and relationship, the truth is the key to a healthy and happy relationship.
